WICKED WHISPERS: Which A-list actor has such a steamship-sized head that he needs to special-order his motorcycle helmets? The Gossip Wrap-Up! Guess: Doesn't Brad Pitt special order his hats because of his hat size?

It sucked hard. Real hard. But it's going to become a trilogy. Fortunately Shia LaBeouf is the hotness right now, so I will participate. Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen, took in $112,000,000 over the weekend. More than $300 million worldwide. That's a lot of money for such a crappy movie. And I paid $12.50 for it and I'm still bitter. You know, I just realized that the title of this flick is so dumb. "The Fallen" didn't get any revenge, they got their asses kicked. Maybe they should have called it "Transformers: The Fallen Attempt to Get Revenge But It Doesn't Work Out For Them". Too long? Then again you are reading a blog with 16 characters in its title.

Did Farrah Fawcett die? Michael Jackson covers next week Time magazine. I suspect a People magazine cover is just around the corner. Cover note: the image of Michael Jackson used by Time magazine was taken by the late Herb Ritts, who will always be my favorite photographer. Check out his work at HerbRitts.com

If I were the Movie Studio or the Insurance company backing that "Lindsay Lohan" project that's supposed to start filming at the end of summer, I'd be looking at this photo saying, 'Man, she ain't going to make it.' Wow. It's not the outfit. It's not the face. It's not that look in her eyes. Hell, it's more than the combination of the three. This photo is all sorts of wrong. I've been wondering how Lindsay has been getting her money, and after this photo, taken at her birthday party in Vegas, I think I know the answer. I'm speechless.

A hairdresser at the hairsalon I go to moved to England a few years back. She was dumbfounded by all the black girls there. Apparently, the Brits can't do "black hair". Maybe Madonna should have taken little Mercy to New York first. You can't even find a black kid in the ghetto with jacked up hair like Lil' Mercy. Lil' Mercy has "southern-backwoods-my-mama-ain't-got-no-electric" hair. How can't Madonna be worth a gazillion dollars and let Lil' Mercy walk around like she's still in one those 'Feed the Children' commercials. I am mortified for her.

One Messy, Meth-Powered Blind Vice Emma Uh-Oh was such the hot, writhing babe for a while not all that long ago really. All supersexy, superskinny, superglossy gal power, mainly on the small screen, Ms. U-O was indeed a major player on some of the boob tube's hottest shows (and she had the hot curves to match). We could totally see her making all the straight menfolk drool on red carpets had she not taken herself off them. How? The worst way, folks—she wasn't lazy or unmotivated. She was on... ...meth, the fastest career-ruining (hell, not to mention life-ruining) substance out there. Now, this ain't like heroin-addicted Brain-Fry Noodlestein, who totally gives everyone the skeeves wherever he goes nowadays. This is a far less for-camera checking out of one's capabilities. Really, you'd never know Em was hooked on the hard stuff, most likely, since she's still totally doable. Great skin and a great stylist can totally cover up anything, even a supernasty meth habit. The producers for Em's last high-profile gig totally loved her and offered to keep her on, even if she went the rehabilitation route. No go. She didn't buy it. I mean, she might as well have starting humming a few "no, no, no" lines from Amy Winehouse's "Rehab" to those suits. In fact, I think she did! But then, Em changed her mind about rehab. She tried it out to appease her employers, but in the end, EUO just didn't want to quit and went back to getting high. She was axed from her latest popular show and, sorry, but Em's chances of sustaining any smoldering It babe status and taking it to the next level went right out along with her trailer's contents. And not only did Em get fired from her last hot job for refusing, ultimately, to give up the nastyass stuff, she lost her last hottie boyfriend, another TV player who's currently gallivanting around town with yet another small-screen honey from a hit teen show. It's all so sadly incestuous, ain't it? And it Aint: Nicollette Sheridan, Shannen Doherty, Jessica Biel The Gossip Wrap-Up! Guess: Mischa Barton

Wicked whispers: Which sultry screen siren slept with several of the leading men in her new big-budget flick, but refused to get horizontal with the director? He's so peeved, he's threatening to ban the gal from his future films. The Gossip Wrap-Up! Guess: I find it hard to believe Megan Fox didn't sleep with Michael Bay. How did she land the part in the first place?

Again.The Tudors star Jonathan Rhys Meyers was arrested today, after "allegedly" attacking a number of staff at the Paris Airport and then threatening to kill them. He was previously arrested for being drunk and disorderly at Dublin airport in November 2007, and then went into rehab for a few weeks. My advise to Jonathan. Don't drink and fly.

He Dead. She too. Lots of sadness in Hollywood today. Two icons in the entertainment industry have passed. Michael Jackson and Farrah Fawcett have gone to meet their maker. Let's hope it works out for them. Not to be crass...but who's going to get the cover of next week's People magazine?

WICKED WHISPERS: Which meanspirited starlet e-mailed a co-star's sex tape to a lengthy list of mutual friends? The Gossip Wrap-Up! Guess: Blake Lively, play nice. Leighton Meester is about to become really famous (although she'll never get a Vogue cover now).

I'll admit, I'm easily distracted. I had planned to head home and blog tonight, but my friend Rabin convinced me to go see the new Transformers flick. Now I "stan" for Shia, even more since I read his "review", so Rabin didn't have to work hard to get me go. We got to the theatre and I realized that I had forgotten my movie passes, which meant I had to pay to see this flick. $12.50. Shia LeBeouf is cute, but he is not $12.50 cute. Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen. Motherofgodwhatiscrap?! I would love to know just how much penis was serviced during the casting process of this movie. Megan Fox - needs to invest some of her money in acting classes. All of that plastic surgery and she still isn't pretty enough to carry off the playing the dumb pretty girlfriend. And you'd think that role would have been perfect fit for her. And people it's a lot of plastic surgery. She had a porn mouth throughout. I get distracted by bad plastic surgery. I cannot tell you the words that came out of that mouth. All I know is that Megan looked like someone had punched her repeatedly. I kept wondering if she was dating Chris Brown. Isabel Lucus - uhm when did anorexia and a snarl become sexy? At first I thought they were trying to be funny. This girl had one look throughout and it wasn't cute. Imagine this face, but with "squintier" eyes and a "Lindsay Lohan" tan. Michael Bay, I hope she was worth it. The only good thing about Transformers (other than Shia, and his parents) were the special effects. And even those got tedious and repetitive after a while. Two machines rolling over each other -over and over again, at breakneck speeds. Thank god they made the Autobots colourful, otherwise I'd have no clue who was fighting who. I'm not even going to discuss the two twin "black" Autobots. We will not go there. I cannot. 2009 and a Black President and still we have this crap. See it for Shia, but you'll still hate it.

I've been too hard on John Mayer. John is a poet. An artiste. John is (now) a good guy, with bad taste in women. Yes, all is forgiven John. Today John twittered this: "...I also want to train you [Perez Hilton] in an old martial art called 'Never Call a Black Dude a Faggot Jitsu." Is there anyone on Perez Hilton's side? Does Perez get no love?

WICKED WHISPERS: Which TV star will absolutely scream when she discovers her husband was chasing girls at an L.A. nightclub over the weekend? Gossip Wrap-Up! Guess: "Scream" actress Courtney Cox and David Arquette.

If anyone knows it's been a slow week in gossip it's me. But Life & Style is claiming that the reason we haven't seen little Vivi(aka Snowball) and Trax Rex Knox is because they're not well. I'm hoping this isn't true. I'd like to believe it's because neither Brad nor Angie have movies coming out. Why waste all the cuteness (and free press)?

Here is Kristen Stewart on the set of The Runaways as Joan Jett. Someone might want to run out a get that jacket in a half size larger. Kristen looks like a hunched-back dominatrix.

What in the hell happened to Courtney Love? I thought those thieves stole her money, not her food? Now please tell me Courtney's wearing nail polish. Because if her finger nails have turned that colour, might I suggest a quick run to the ER.She is so messed up. I almost feel sorry for her.

She trumps Life or Death Classic story of celebrity entitlement. And she’s supposed to be so professional and sweet, not nearly as many diva stories about her than about her peers, though if you’re getting in the way of her meal, and her Maybach, you better move the f-ck out, even if you’re an old woman in an emergency situation. It was two blocks from the Waverly very recently. An elderly woman – 84 years old – went into heart failure. The paramedic arrived immediately and tried to stabilise her before moving her to the hospital. It became a traffic clusterf-ck so the cops had to redirect vehicles over to the next block because the ambulance was waiting for the patient. A black Maybach approaches, disregards the police instruction, and drives towards the ambulance. An officer stops the car and tells the driver to reroute: Driver: We're going to the Waverly Inn. Officer: We have an emergency situation and everyone has to re-route to the next block over - just go one block around. (Moaning and groaning and whining was heard from the female passenger in the back seat). Driver: Isn't there any way we could get through? Offider: Sir, this is an emergency vehicle, we have an emergency situation - EVERYone must re-route. You'll have to go around the block. And then an imperious (female) voice pipes up from the back of the Maybach.. "Well can't they just move the ambulance?" The officer is incredulous. Then annoyed. And then he gives it to her, informing our star that "LIFE OR DEATH situations dictate traffic decisions - not anything or ANYONE else. You must re-route now." She grudgingly told her driver to find another way, inconvenienced that a senior citizen had to choose her mealtime to have a heart attack. The nerve Gossip Wrap-Up! Guess: Maybach and Meals. Beyoncé

I am not a huge fan of movie stills -it probably has something to do with putting together press kits, what a tedious job. But sometimes, great shots totally make me want to see a film (very rarely though, I'm a trailer girl). Here are some stills from Tim Burton's Alice in Wonderland (in 3D!). I cannot wait until 2010.Johnny Depp as The Mad Hatter. Love his gap! Helen Bonham Carter as 'The Red Queen'. In person or in character, Helen creeps me out! Anne Hathaway as 'The White Queen'. She actually looks good here. Tim Burton is a genius, he made Anne Hathaway look beautiful.

Remember when Jay Z declared Beyoncé "the hottest chick in the game". Whatever dude. I'm officially putting Beyoncé on my Ciara Tranny Watch List. She looks likes she's hiding franks and beans. I'm also concerned Beyoncé is going to pop a breast implant (again).

WICKED WHISPERS: Which hot young bachelor has (quite disappointingly) revealed himself to be a totally awful kisser? The Gossip Wrap-Up! Guess: Going with the 'hottest' bachelor this summer (whatever), Chase Crawford. He probably is much better at kissing boys.

So the MMVAs went down in Toronto last night. Great show, great turn-out as usual. But I cannot discuss the MMVAs without blogging about Perez Hilton's VICIOUS assault. Any man (or woman) who would tweet after calling 911, deserves the attention they so desperately want. 9-1-1 Three key strokes. Well four 'cause you gotta push send. Then discuss your problem and wait. But the fabulous Perez, isn't like the rest of us. He's so brave, and so committed to the cause. After calling 9-1-1 Perez did what any real blogger would do. Tweeted his problem so that his followers could help.

"I’m in shock. I need the police ASAP. Please come to the SoHo Metropolitan Hotel now. Please. I was assaulted by Will.I.Am of the Black Eyed Peas and his security guards. I am bleeding. Please, I need to file a police report. No joke. I called the police BEFORE I Tweeted about it. They were not showing up. I felt helpless. I took photos and police have photos they took as well. The truth will prevail. I can handle a verbal assault. But to hit me? To make me bleed? No. I can’t and won’t accept that. I just feel so empty right now. In shock. I need to work."

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Punk Ass, the artist formerly Chris Brown, left court the only way he could. Flanked by armed guards. Chris if you can sit at a Lake Game and no one harassed you, I suspect your safe. Chris pretty much got a pass today. In what came as a surprise to no one, Chris copped a last minute plea deal, rather than having Rihanna testify. Chris has been ordered to stay 50 yards away from Rihanna. He'll spend 180 days doing community labor (8 hours a day -- 1440 hours total). He'll do his service in Virginia which is where Brown lives. AND He gets 5 years probation for FELONY assault -- he pled guilty. I'm pretty sure being on probation for felony assault will limit your travel. His black ass probably won't be coming to Canada anytime soon, nor the UK. My American friends, he's all yours for the next 5. Enjoy.I think TMZ summed up Rihanna's court outfit best. She's dressed like a pop star going to a funeral. LOL. I don't understand the bag though.

Camila Alves is showing you b*tches how it's done. Matthew McConaughey announced yesterday, Father's Day that he and Camila are expecting their second child. You go girl! It would appear that Camila Alves has quickly realized that her handbag line could not keep her in the lifestyle she has quickly become accustomed to. Child support for two kids gives one the freedom that one child alone cannot guarantee.

I was all supportive of the Madonna-Mercy adoption. Until now. Here is Madonna and Lil Mercy of Malawi at Madonna's house in London. Now why couldn't Madonna's people have run a Afro-pick through that chile's hair before taking her off the damn private plane? That kid crossed continents and time zones looking like a hot ass mess. This photo is going to show up in her yearbook one day.

WICKED WHISPERS: Which reality star was too busy flirting with her date in the Hamptons to pay attention to her kids? Gossip Wrap-Up! Guess: Was Denise Richards in the Hamptons this weekend?

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WICKED WHISPERS: Which ditsy blond didn't seem to care when a crowd of ladies caught her sniffing Colombia's finest - right out in the open - in Atlantic City? Gossip Wrap-Up! Guess: Pamela Anderson

I know you shouldn't judge people by the clothes they wear, but I'm starting to think Michael Jackson had mental problems.

If Victoria Beckham went through all the trouble of downsizing her horrendous boob job, why did she get the same ridiculous model? Half-grapefruit-shaped implants are never a good look people. NEVER. Somewhere, Anna Wintour is laughing her ass off. Don't do it Anna. Don't ever let Vogue magazine stoop so low!

WICKED WHISPERS: Which married hot tamale of an actress has three boyfriends on the side? One is rich, one is pretty and one is a rough-and-tumble Oscar nominee. Gossip Wrap-Up! Guess: Given that it's 2009 and we still love these antiquated stereotypes. "Hot Tamale"? I'm thinking Latino. Married Latino who's hot right now? Eva Longoria Parker or Selma Hayek. I'm more inclined to believe that Selma would be cheating on her billionaire than Eva on Tony Parker for some odd reason.

The Council of Fashion Designers of America held their annual awards last night.I'm thinking we need to do a benefit for Zoe Saldana. Raise some money for a feeding tube and some a can of Ensure to fatten this girl up. Vera Wang. Great designer, but for once in her life can she put some lip colour on? Taylor Lautner looking sharp. He's so much cuter than Robert Pattison, pity he doesn't get the attention. Tallulah Willis. Exactly which one of the Willis girls is the cute one? Ralph Lauren and his wife. Ralph's been wearing the same clothes since the eighties -I guess you can do that when you have great style. Molly Sims wearing an umbrella with Marilyn Monroe's picture on it. Somehow it works for her. For me, I hate it.Kerry Washington is so beautiful. But does she do anything other than L'oreal ads and show up on red carpets? Has she been in anything since that dance movie 6 years ago? Anna Wintour and Justin Timberlake. It took this photo to make me realize that neither of them is all that good looking.

Sasha Baron Cohen covers GQ magazine as Bruno. Too funny, although I have yet to find GQ's "Comedy Issues" as amusing as their covers. Sasha's a hairy guy naturally, isn't he?

We need to start combing L.A. area pawn shops, somewhere out there is $400K in jewels. Scotland Yard reportedly wants to speak with Lindsay Lohan about $400,000 worth of missing bling that she sported for an Elle magazine fashion shoot on June 6th. A diamond necklace and earrings worn by the actress, who last year borrowed (without permission) another woman's mink coat from a NYC Club, vanished from London's Big Sky Studios. The Dior jewelry was lent it to Elle magazine for the shoot. Investigators said a dozen magazine staffers may also be questioned. "There have been no arrests at this stage," a police spokeswoman said. "We will speak to a number of people in connection with the inquiry." Good luck finding it. It's been reported that Lindsay has been acting all jittery and "weird" lately. That generally happens when addicts are flush with cash.

Apparently the "metrosexuals" are king in the soccer world.Cristano Ronaldo getting a therapeutic massage over the weekend. I think we now know why massages are best left to private spaces. Another Ronaldo gem. Newly engaged, Manchester United Star Rio Ferdinand walking around Israel yesterday. His people claim he is making fun of Ronaldo. He's getting a side-eye from me anyways.

Remember when Bruce Willis was hot, without all the airbrushing. Yeah, me neither cause it was so long ago. But his new wife, some British "lingerie model" just scored her first cover thanks to him. Clearly Mrs. Willis isn't really cover material. But starf*cking will get you there! Good work girl!

WICKED WHISPERS: Which male music diva kicked a billionaire out of his house — just because he put his dirty feet on a pristine white couch? Gossip Wrap-Up! Guess: P. Diddy or Elton John for the male diva and Ron Burkle for the billionaire.

Please take a good look at Lil Mercy of Malawi, make that formerly of Malawi now of Manhattan. Take note of that polar fleece she’s sporting. Second hand polyester, with pills. I guess they don’t have a clothes shaver at her orphanage. Take a good look at her hair. She’s got twists, but clearly they didn’t have enough money to buy a full pack of weave. No worries though. Poor lil orphan Africa, ain’t eva gonna be poor again. Lil Mercy is en route to Madonna as we speak. By private jet. Luckiest little African in the world. Actually, third luckiest, Zahara and David Banda got out first.

Megan Fox covers Entertainment Weekly. Megan's an inspiration for trailer park girls everywhere.

Hollywood is leaving me in a constant state of confusion. According to the Daily Mirror Katie Holmes is rehearsing at CBS Studios in Los Angeles for a one-off appearance on the TV dance competition So You Think You Can Dance. Why? I have no idea. She's not the strongest actress, but surely she's not that bad. I don't see how it will benefit her career dancing on a TV show. Especially one whose target audience is younger than Katie. Is dancing on TV the hip new thing? Because all of those folks I see doing it, seem to go right back to the d-list when their done. Katie needs better people.

WICKED WHISPERS: Which married Oscar winner wasn’t acting too kingly when he was caught groping a waitress at a N.Y.C. nightclub recently? Gossip Wrap-Up! Guess: How about Forest Whitaker (won an Oscar for his role in the Last King of Scotland?)

Megan needs to back the f*ck off my Shia! Now that the reviews are in, I'm getting territorial. At least Shia LaBeouf looks like he couldn't care less.

Chastity Bono (Cher & the late Sonny Bono's child) is becoming a man. Chaz, as he now calls himself, has already started the gender reassignment process. He will continue to be in his relationship with his girlfriend Jennifer. Back in university, I met a couple of lesbians. Fast forward 5 years and I see them on some tv show, one of them has come out as transgendered and is having reassignment surgery. Here's what I find confusing. If you're a lesbian, and your girlfriend becomes your boyfriend, aren't you now straight? Or at least in a heterosexual relationship, once all the paperwork is done. I ask this because my friend who shall remain nameless, although you'll find his name somewhere in this blog, is an openly gay male. At one point he used to do AIDS outreach in Toronto. At one of his meetings, a guy, who was actually a girl in the process of have sex reassignment surgery, asked him out. Now this Guy/girl, looked every bit like a man, clearly she was supposed to be male. But he hadn't had the surgery yet, so he still had a vagina (Sex changes used to be covered by public health here Canada, but the conservatives removed it a few years back, with many people half way through the process -although if you are in the military, it's covered). My gay male friend wanted nothing to do with her/him as he wasn't about to "be playing with anyone with a vagina". Me, I was trying to figure out why on earth would a women become a man, only to date men? Or why would a woman, who believed she was a man, get pregnant for that matter? See, it's all so confusing, to me anyway. But best of luck Chaz Bono.

I'm all over the gold diggers lately. But sad news this week. One of the most successful jump-off-to-wifey stories has ended in a divorce. Usher and Tameka are calling it quits. We all shouldn't be too hard on Tameka. Think of how far she rose. From employee to wifey, all accomplished even though she was married with 4 kids, and Usher's mom and fans hated her. Her head game must be on point. The mistake she made was marrying Usher. She should have just had the kids out of wedlock. She probably would have gotten way more, than the prenup is going to give her with just under two years of marriage. Too bad, too sad. See ya Tameka.

Megan Fox at the German premiere of 'Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen' in Berlin on Sunday. It looks like she's had some new work done. Somethings not quite settled on her face. (Click photo to enlarge it.)

Princess Powder-Puff has had quite the rocky existence for the past couple of years. Besides being a sizeable tabloid target, Princess P. has had some career setbacks, too. Maybe that's because everyone around Pee uses her for something. And whatever goodies those fake pals are gaining, it's never in PPP's best interest, for sure. See, Puff hardly has any real buds. Sad, but very true. Now, don't feel too bad for the babe, 'cause with her money she could easily be getting help if she wanted it. Instead, Triple-Pee resorts to seeking a different kinda aid from those around her. Like drugs. The hard stuff, babes. Like what ruins major divas' careers before the whole global tabloid world's eyes. Powder-Puff is scrounging for a fix and isn't being too subtle about it, in whatever town she happens to be touring through. And what's Pee's great idea so nobody finds out? She's asking her crew members left and right for them to score something, anything, for her. Genius. Yikes, this is definitely gonna make PPP's comeback 10 times harder. Just more trainwreckishly delish for us to watch, that's all. Oh, you all do know Princess isn't used to performing sober, don't you? It's something she absolutely hates doing, and it's definitely showing—the few times she agrees to be forced into such a desultory state. So sad, too, 'cause Pee used to have it all. Boys, hits, good-girl fame—the works. And it ain't: Nicole Scherzinger, Nadine Coyle, Christina Aguilara Gossip Wrap-Up! Guess: Britney Spears.

I got off work early Friday with every intention of blogging before heading out to the late showing of The Taking of Pelham 123. Unfortunately, clicking a link on LaineyGossip derailed my plans. Who knew Lainey was so dangerous? Tales from A Groupie. Mother of god! When did this blog start? I feel so much shame. I spent far too much time reading this crap. LOVES IT! I’m a comment junkie. I think that the comments are sometimes the best part of a blog (hint hint, nudge, nudge), and I was laughing my ass off at some of the foolishness out there. But the tags were the best. Gold Digger#1? Gold Digger#1 has a blog. I think she’s my new role model. Girlfriend is giving tips, only I think she’s serious. If she isn’t serious, the people who read her site are. Too f*cking funny. Gold Digger started her blog on May 26, we had this discussion on May 18th. Anonymous (May 18 10:29pm) are you Gold Digger#1? But back to Tales from a Groupie. Shia LeBeouf. I’m now crushing on Shia. And my Nunez. Did you watch Miami Ink (before the b-stards at TLC took them off the air)? It’s always been a toss up between Chris Nunez and Ami James for me. Lust them both. Ami was always a little ahead because of the bald head and the bad attitude. But Ami has been cast aside, kicked to the curb. I’ve offering him up to Victoria over at The Guys of Love Hate/Miami Ink Blog –he’s all yours Victoria, I’m now claiming Chris Nunez. It’s funny, I read stuff on people who I have no clue who they are. And people who I wouldn’t consider even if they were gazillionaires and I was homeless (Rick Ross –it not his size it’s his beard and his name that creeps me out). And Travis Barker, never in my life would I have thought that I would care what sex with him was like –but I read it anyway. I swear I wasted a considerable chunk of my life reading this blog. But it has 366 Google Followers, so apparently I'm not the only one. There’s a whole world on the Internet that I had no clue existed. Both of these b*tches are getting a link!

I know some of you a lot younger than me, but back in the day John Travolta had a career resurrection. Actually I think he had two. First stab at fame was the Grease/Saturday Night Fever/Welcome Back Kotter period –all well before my time. Then there were those Look Who’s Talking movies with Kristie Alley. Then there was the Pulp Fiction/Broken Arrow, and my personal favourite Face Off. Did you see Face Off? Nic Cage and John Travolta switch faces. I know dumb ass premise but I love that movie. So last night I went to see Pelham 123, Denzel Washington and John Travolta. Overall, it's not bad. John Travolta works better as a bad guy. Although he seemed like a bad guy who got turned out in prison. But both of them are starting to show their wear and tear. They both looked ashy as all hell. Who knew white people got ashy? Maybe the DOP needs glasses. What surprised me was that Pelham landed in the number three spot. A respectable $25 million, but still third. The Hangover was great, but I’m of the ilk you don’t pay to see movies twice in the theatre and somehow I think a lot of 18 year old boys were repeat offenders on this one.

Bro Massage They’ve been friends a long time. Recently worked together. Both family men now supposedly settled down. But not quite. Several times a week, very late at night, they’d call up for room service together. Oh no, not for food, but for a certain kind of massage. Like…together. They’d get off on it together. Literally. Apparently they’ve been doing this for years. It’s how they bond. Some dudes like beer. These dudes like the hand and mouth special. Lately it hasn’t happened often enough – schedules, kids, etc. Needless to say, when the opportunity presented itself, they made up for lost time. Problem: one of the wives found out. Is now threatening to tell the other. Almost like blackmail. She wants them to stop hanging out AND she wants the friend to find her husband a replacement gig to make up for the one he’ll lose if she makes him pull out of their next collaboration. Hollywood wives can wheel and deal, see? But she’s been placated before. He’s waiting for the rage to go down, and then he’ll buy her off again. A break from the bro massage until then. June 12 Update: Not Matt Damon and Ben Affleck June 15 Update: Not the GMD and Ben Stiller. Also not Lance Armstrong and Matthew McConaughey. Gossip Wrap-Up! Guess: I'm going to follow someone else on this one: Judd Apatow and Adam Sandler.

WICKED WHISPERS: Which up-and-coming film star was smoking an alien substance out in the open at a recent NYC party? Gossip Wrap-Up! Guess: How vague is that, unless the alien is a clue, then one of the people from the new Star Trek flick?

Carrie Prejean, Miss California lost her crown today, four months after telling Perez Hilton and the rest of America that gays shouldn't marry. Had she said something about blacks, her ass would have been out of a job right then and there. But the Gay Rights Movement isn't as strong Black civil rights movement -that's what happens when you can't manipulate liberal white guilt. I kid, I kid. It's the "We were slaves" bus we insist on riding. Actually Miss California didn't lose her job because of her "opinions" on gay rights, she lost her job because she was too uppity. Missy decided she was too big for the Miss USA organization and she wanted to run things. Donald Trump says that while she was great to him, she treated everyone in the organization like "sh*t". Fortunately us, she did it by email:

"You do not cooperate with me, and you pick and chose [sic] the the [sic] things YOU want me to do. That is not happening anymore. Stop speaking for me. I have MY own voice." And in another e-mail, she really brought on the charm, "Also I was asked to fill in for a dj on a local radio show.. I'll be reading from a show biz script Monday. I am doing this."

Prejean says, "What's behind this I think is a political debate. They don't agree with the stance that I took [on Prop 8]. Shanna [Moakler] is trying to bash me. They don't like me. From day one they wanted me out and they got what they wanted."

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Suddenly a whole lotta skanks are single. Love is not in the air for the young and skankalicious. Miley Cyrus came to her senses and dumped her much older boyfriend. I am assuming she dumped him, because he twittered that he was "so sad". Yeah, the lil bitch probably cut off his credit line. I'm still trying to figure out who told this little girl that she should be supporting a man at her age. But I guess after supporting her dad, it seemed kind of natural... Paris Hilton and her “I only have one pose” boyfriend have also split, Paris’s rep confirmed today. No word if Paris left any lasting gifts behind. This one makes me sad, because I had planned on learning her now ex-boyfriends name, but there's no point now. Finally, Kanye West confirmed that he and Amber Rose have broken up. Old news, I know. I'm not sure what kind of man "breaks up" with a girl who was an out lesbian prior to dating him. Clearly she rode that boy for all he’s worth, still wondering if Kayne got to ride her.

WICKED WHISPERS: Which music man brings along three necessities on all his tours: men in tight shorts, muscular food servers and Persian rugs? Gossip Wrap-Up! Guess: Either David Geffen or Clive Davis, I'm going with Geffen for this one, as Clive is of that generation that doesn't discuss his homosexuality.

WICKED WHISPERS: Which dreamy-eyed actor is embarrassed to admit he’s hooking up with a hard-partying starlet? Gossip Wrap-Up! Guess: Entourage's Adrian Grenier and Paris?

...For those living in a cave at least. American Idol's first runner up, Adam Lambert will discuss his "sexuality" in an upcoming Rolling Stone magazine cover story. I guess there's a need for him to discuss it. It will help out all those fools who thought Clay Aiken was straight. I think you'd have to live in a small town and have no exposure to cable or the Internet to have any questions about Adam's sexuality. It's obvious isn't it? Who out there needs him to confirm it?